Sparked a bit of a tantrum in our house last night when I mentioned to big man that I would like to find out the gender this time.
We didn't last time because he didn't want to and I figured that you can change not knowing but not take back knowing - hope that makes sense. I had scans every couple of days at the end because of the GD so could have found out at any time but at the stage there was no point in finding out, I would soon enough anyway.
This time it's different, if I'm having another boy I want to know ahead of time so that I can prepare. Not that I will love another son any less but I do so want a girl, one of each, perfecto and all that, and to be honest, I'm afraid if it's another boy and that is announced to me in the delivery room I might show some small disappointment, however fleeting it is I don't want my child to feel that even for a nanosecond so I'd prefer to know beforehand.
Big man doesn't see it that way, but then again he rarely sees things my way so I expected this. I could do without the tantrums though, the little man does enough of those, I don't need the 6' version doing an encore!
I'm not even 100% sure I want to find out, and there is the chance as has just happened with my sister (due in April) that the babe will not cooperate at the Level II scan and keep his or her legs crossed, but big mans reaction last night could just make me dig my heels in! Me? Stubborn? There's a pair of us in it!
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
Well well well Beta #3
Beta #3 taken this morning was 1264
Again from http://babymed.com/pregnancy%2Dtools/hcg/
First hCG: 237 mIU/ml Second hCG: 1264 mIU/ml
hCG Difference: 1027 mIU/ml
Time Difference: 96 hours
Total hCG Increase: 433 % (5.3)
Daily Rate Increase: 52% (1.52)
Two Day Rate Increase: 131% (2.31)
Assessment: The Two-Day hCG rise was 131% and is considered adequate.
YAHOO - guess that means I better start taking this seriously!
Not that I haven't been taking my vitamins and all that but after the drama of last Tursday and Friday I kind of braced myself for the worst y'know.
I don't have terrible pregnancy symptoms, sore breasts, seriously bad gass, am farting machine, but other than that, I'm fine. That was worrying me, but it's early days so I should just be quiet now and appreciate the life growing inside me - good gods did I just say that?
Anyway great news, am thrilled, feel like I have been holding my breath for days!
Again from http://babymed.com/pregnancy%2Dtools/hcg/
First hCG: 237 mIU/ml Second hCG: 1264 mIU/ml
hCG Difference: 1027 mIU/ml
Time Difference: 96 hours
Total hCG Increase: 433 % (5.3)
Daily Rate Increase: 52% (1.52)
Two Day Rate Increase: 131% (2.31)
Assessment: The Two-Day hCG rise was 131% and is considered adequate.
YAHOO - guess that means I better start taking this seriously!
Not that I haven't been taking my vitamins and all that but after the drama of last Tursday and Friday I kind of braced myself for the worst y'know.
I don't have terrible pregnancy symptoms, sore breasts, seriously bad gass, am farting machine, but other than that, I'm fine. That was worrying me, but it's early days so I should just be quiet now and appreciate the life growing inside me - good gods did I just say that?
Anyway great news, am thrilled, feel like I have been holding my breath for days!
Friday, December 15, 2006
Beta #2
Well, all is not lost it seems, blood drawn today gave an hcg level of 237, up from 79 4 days ago which according to this calculator is "The Two-Day hCG rise was 73% and is considered adequate."
Still not out of the woods, when I went for an appt. with the OBGYN the nurse said "so, you're here for a missed abortion consult" - nice! No sez I, I'm still pregnant as far as I know, do you know something I don't?
Silly cow, it was all I could do not to slap her hard.
The doc was nice, said don't worry the numbers are good, it's too early to see anything in the scan. Come back again on Tuesday dn have more blood drawn and we'll see how the levels are.
So I'm feeling more hopeful but not letting my guard down yet. Until I see that heartbeat I won't relax and even then probably.
Best mate has been a rock, she of the twins, she's been through 3 pregnancies with me now, 1 ended badly, 1 gave me my son and now this. Couldn't survive without her.
So I'm going to try to enjoy the weekend and stay calm until Tuesday.
Symptoms today - enormous poos, yeah seriously, enormous, still farting up a storm, tmi? Sorry, but it's the real deal and I wish someone had told me about these things when I first got pregnant, hey sister you will fart and poo for Ireland for the next year or so - oh great, thats' a relief! Breasts still painful but not at the levels they were last time when I had to strap them down before bed, if the sheet brushed them I screamed in pain, not there but it could come yet. Breasts are such wonderful creations aren't they? Breastfeeding my son was one of the most rewarding aspects of pregnancy/birth for me.
Anyhoo that's it, obviously mentally in a better place than yesterday and physically not too bad either, have had a few too many hands up my hoohaa lately but them's the breaks.
PS: The sexy dreams have kicked in, yahoo!
Still not out of the woods, when I went for an appt. with the OBGYN the nurse said "so, you're here for a missed abortion consult" - nice! No sez I, I'm still pregnant as far as I know, do you know something I don't?
Silly cow, it was all I could do not to slap her hard.
The doc was nice, said don't worry the numbers are good, it's too early to see anything in the scan. Come back again on Tuesday dn have more blood drawn and we'll see how the levels are.
So I'm feeling more hopeful but not letting my guard down yet. Until I see that heartbeat I won't relax and even then probably.
Best mate has been a rock, she of the twins, she's been through 3 pregnancies with me now, 1 ended badly, 1 gave me my son and now this. Couldn't survive without her.
So I'm going to try to enjoy the weekend and stay calm until Tuesday.
Symptoms today - enormous poos, yeah seriously, enormous, still farting up a storm, tmi? Sorry, but it's the real deal and I wish someone had told me about these things when I first got pregnant, hey sister you will fart and poo for Ireland for the next year or so - oh great, thats' a relief! Breasts still painful but not at the levels they were last time when I had to strap them down before bed, if the sheet brushed them I screamed in pain, not there but it could come yet. Breasts are such wonderful creations aren't they? Breastfeeding my son was one of the most rewarding aspects of pregnancy/birth for me.
Anyhoo that's it, obviously mentally in a better place than yesterday and physically not too bad either, have had a few too many hands up my hoohaa lately but them's the breaks.
PS: The sexy dreams have kicked in, yahoo!
Thursday, December 14, 2006
Not looking good
Had an ultrasound today, nothing to be seen but tech assured me that it's early and not to be disheartened. Then the nurse from my docs office called to ask me to come in tomorrow for another blood test - hmm, not good I thought so I asked why.
Well, she said, your hcg level was only 79 which is low.
Oh right sez I, would have been good to know this on Tuesday when the doc called to tell me the test was positive.
I've googled my heart out and yes smoked 2 cigarettes, because I've been here before, the every 2nd day level tests hoping to see the numbers double only to have it all crap out in the end.
So I'm not feeling too good, in fact I'm feeling shite, I've had a sense of doom about this from the beginning but I've been convincing myself that it's just me being a nervous nelly.
Maybe it is, at this stage all that is left is hope.
If you're reading, send me some good vibes because I think I will lose my fucking mind if I have another miscarriage. It will make this pregnancy #4 with only 1 child to show for my troubles.
Oh well, have to break the news to the big man, he doesn't even know I went for a scan.
Well, she said, your hcg level was only 79 which is low.
Oh right sez I, would have been good to know this on Tuesday when the doc called to tell me the test was positive.
I've googled my heart out and yes smoked 2 cigarettes, because I've been here before, the every 2nd day level tests hoping to see the numbers double only to have it all crap out in the end.
So I'm not feeling too good, in fact I'm feeling shite, I've had a sense of doom about this from the beginning but I've been convincing myself that it's just me being a nervous nelly.
Maybe it is, at this stage all that is left is hope.
If you're reading, send me some good vibes because I think I will lose my fucking mind if I have another miscarriage. It will make this pregnancy #4 with only 1 child to show for my troubles.
Oh well, have to break the news to the big man, he doesn't even know I went for a scan.
A girl??
Madame Zaritska's reading
Madame Zaritska, our resident clairvoyant, wants to help you prepare for the arrival of your child. Here she does her best to predict certain aspects of your labor and birth experience.
What she senses for you
The day you deliver, outside will be sunny. Your baby will arrive at night.
After a labor lasting approximately 11 hours, WHAT! your child, a girl, will be born. Your baby will weigh about 7 pounds, 10 ounces, and will be 18 inches long. This child will have green eyes and be completely bald. Ah a little baldie!
But there is more. It is perfectly healthy and normal to want to look good, even during these interesting months! I sense you feel a little reluctant. Well, you're not being silly or shallow -- you're taking care of yourself. And I am happy that you are.
Well that's nice Madame, I remember doing this last time, wish I had kept it!
Am off to the doc this avo for a quick scan. Have been having bad pain in my right side so they want to rule out ectopic - don't think it is, am just a nervous nelly.
Am guessing it's just digestion issues, have been suffering with constipation the past few days, been trying to drown my enemy with Diet Coke - ha ha, yes people I know I should be drinking 10gallons of water each day, but I'm just not a water drinker, I'll have to improve I guess.
Day 5 off the smokes, man I hate quitting smoking, it's fucking hard, I don't care what Allen Carr says it is hard, this time I will not start smoking again, no way.
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
ooh feeling the morning sickness
first bout of morning sickness today - not terribly bad just there and a reminder of how bad it can get.
I remember weeks 6-9 being brutal last time, I'm in week 5 now so fearing the worst for next week, have been attempting to head issues off at the pass, had a lovely bowl of oatmeal this morning and been filling my face with oranges since then. No bananas though, too high in sugar.
Dug out my Healthy Eating in Pregnancy book last night so will do my best to stick to a sensible low sugar diet and avoid being an insulin junkie.
In other news, my brother and his wife had their court date in Russia today to adopt their little boy, seems like they will get to pick him up earlier than expected and could even be home with him for Xmas - what joy!
My sister-in-law and my best friends struggles with infertility have really opened my eyes, it's a cruel affliction and my heart breaks for people who try so hard to do something that other folk take for granted. My best mate has twin boys now and my sister in law finally has her little boy within her sights, happy endings all round and hopefully some salve for the battle wounds.
I remember weeks 6-9 being brutal last time, I'm in week 5 now so fearing the worst for next week, have been attempting to head issues off at the pass, had a lovely bowl of oatmeal this morning and been filling my face with oranges since then. No bananas though, too high in sugar.
Dug out my Healthy Eating in Pregnancy book last night so will do my best to stick to a sensible low sugar diet and avoid being an insulin junkie.
In other news, my brother and his wife had their court date in Russia today to adopt their little boy, seems like they will get to pick him up earlier than expected and could even be home with him for Xmas - what joy!
My sister-in-law and my best friends struggles with infertility have really opened my eyes, it's a cruel affliction and my heart breaks for people who try so hard to do something that other folk take for granted. My best mate has twin boys now and my sister in law finally has her little boy within her sights, happy endings all round and hopefully some salve for the battle wounds.
Tuesday, December 12, 2006
Say it again sister!
Antique Mommy says it so well...
You live and learn eh?
So in a pregnancy journalling kinda way - am having weird ass dreams really freaky scary violent types that freak me the fuck out in the middle of the night. Last time I remember big man saving me from all sorts of monsters in the middle of the night. He's not so saviourish this time, more like Hrumph she went and got herself knocked up again so she doesn't have to do any heavy lifting, hrumph... well he's probably not thinking that but that's what's coming across big man - oh yes it is.
Strangely I'm getting all tied up in the We're not married game again, doesn't bother me unless I'm pregnant it seems. Bothering me now, bothered me last time, will hopefully get over myself pretty quickly.
Physical symptoms - ravenous hunger first thing in the morning, crampy lower belly, bad gas, man oh man do not stand up wind of me people, phew!
Got the official yes you're up the pole confirmation from the doc earlier today, nice! Starting to believe it now. Made 1st appt. for Dec 27th, they tried to hold me off until Jan 12 but I said no way, I'm a nervous nelly and I want in to see someone asap. Bit peeved 'cos they don't have ultrasound facilities at this place so will have to travel for them, slight inconvenience.
Anyhoo, other than all that, delighted that it's not just me imagining lines on sticks, I really am pregnant - mad!
I’ve grown fat in the nearly three years I’ve been a parent. Not so much from eating after my own child, which I said I would never do, but I do -- but from eating my own words.I'm trying my best to be better with this pregnancy. Obviously my eyes have been opened to the reality of labour and birth plans gone awry and television is regular in our house, I didn't actually imagine that I wouldn't let my child watch tv, I'm a big fan of tv myself but I am guilty of raised eyebrows and smug, well when I have have my child, I won't...comments.
I remember when I was about seven months pregnant, Antique Daddy and I were playing cards with some friends. With my child tucked safely inside my womb, I was still free to waddle up to my soapbox and spout off all the idealistic things I would never do that those other horrible, less diligent parents allow their children to do.
You live and learn eh?
So in a pregnancy journalling kinda way - am having weird ass dreams really freaky scary violent types that freak me the fuck out in the middle of the night. Last time I remember big man saving me from all sorts of monsters in the middle of the night. He's not so saviourish this time, more like Hrumph she went and got herself knocked up again so she doesn't have to do any heavy lifting, hrumph... well he's probably not thinking that but that's what's coming across big man - oh yes it is.
Strangely I'm getting all tied up in the We're not married game again, doesn't bother me unless I'm pregnant it seems. Bothering me now, bothered me last time, will hopefully get over myself pretty quickly.
Physical symptoms - ravenous hunger first thing in the morning, crampy lower belly, bad gas, man oh man do not stand up wind of me people, phew!
Got the official yes you're up the pole confirmation from the doc earlier today, nice! Starting to believe it now. Made 1st appt. for Dec 27th, they tried to hold me off until Jan 12 but I said no way, I'm a nervous nelly and I want in to see someone asap. Bit peeved 'cos they don't have ultrasound facilities at this place so will have to travel for them, slight inconvenience.
Anyhoo, other than all that, delighted that it's not just me imagining lines on sticks, I really am pregnant - mad!
Monday, December 11, 2006
I shouldn't do this
to myself but I've been googling miscarriage risks and gestational diabetes - and have myself scared shitless.
It brings it all back, that horrible visit to the ER where the technician did a scan and told me matter of factly that there was "no baby in there" well gee thanks Mrs. Compassionate. The repeated visits to the OB/GYN office desperate that this time they would find a heartbeat and it was just too early before.
Gods I don't want to go through that again.
Like I said before I won't be able to relax until I see that heartbeat, little man showed me his heart beat at 6w 3d so hopefully this little bean will be as cooperative.
Gestational Diabetes - pales in comparison, I ended up injecting insulin 3 times a day at the end of my last pregnancy and testing my blood sugar about 6 times a day, that all leaves some serious track marks people! Hopefully this time I'll avoid it by eating sensibly (yeah right) and exercising (in your dreams) and not gaining so much weight (54lbs people) that's the plan anyway, apparently once you have it in one pregnancy you have a 90% chance of a reccurrance in subsequent pregnancies - nice odds there.
Hope to avoid induction and c-section as well this time, but I'm getting way way ahead of myself so I'll stop all this idle speculation and just hope I see/hear those galloping hoofbeats in a few weeks!
It brings it all back, that horrible visit to the ER where the technician did a scan and told me matter of factly that there was "no baby in there" well gee thanks Mrs. Compassionate. The repeated visits to the OB/GYN office desperate that this time they would find a heartbeat and it was just too early before.
Gods I don't want to go through that again.
Like I said before I won't be able to relax until I see that heartbeat, little man showed me his heart beat at 6w 3d so hopefully this little bean will be as cooperative.
Gestational Diabetes - pales in comparison, I ended up injecting insulin 3 times a day at the end of my last pregnancy and testing my blood sugar about 6 times a day, that all leaves some serious track marks people! Hopefully this time I'll avoid it by eating sensibly (yeah right) and exercising (in your dreams) and not gaining so much weight (54lbs people) that's the plan anyway, apparently once you have it in one pregnancy you have a 90% chance of a reccurrance in subsequent pregnancies - nice odds there.
Hope to avoid induction and c-section as well this time, but I'm getting way way ahead of myself so I'll stop all this idle speculation and just hope I see/hear those galloping hoofbeats in a few weeks!
Well - It's still a secret
but I'm sharing the news here so it is and it isn't.
Yes that means I'm like all of 4 weeks pregnant right now so I'm toying with fate by blogging about it but I didn't keep any kind of journal for my pregnancy with my son and I'm sorry I didn't now so this is redemption.
Estimated Due Date is August 17, 2007 and Chinese Gender Prediction says it's a girl.
I guessed I might be pregnant when I started hitting this insane exhaustion wall every afternoon last week, it's due to hit me now again in about 20 minutes, hmm I thought, then the constipation set in and I thought hmm again, I've been here before so I bought a test on Friday even though my period wasn't due until today and there it was a faded + sign, nah I thought and threw it away. Did another one the next day and there it was again a +...so i took it outside to big man who was putting a new roof on the shed and asked him if it was real. He seemed to think it was and reacted as he does.
Bought 2 more tests Saturday evening on teh way to work and did one at work, two || this time, definitely there. One more test Sunday morning confirming the two ||s and now I'm starting to believe it.
Made an appt with the doc to have an official test this afternoon, if it's positive then I think I'll really believe it.
Well I'll really believe it when I see the galloping heartbeat on a scan. Sadly I had a miscarriage at 8 weeks the year before little man was born so I'm all too aware of the risks. I'll relax into it after 12 weeks.
In the meantime if you've stumbled across me and you don't know me this might be incredibly boring for you, if you do know me chances are you're getting a link to this in Jan 2007 so are reading backwards, welcome!
Baby #2 is due to arrive in August '07.
Yes that means I'm like all of 4 weeks pregnant right now so I'm toying with fate by blogging about it but I didn't keep any kind of journal for my pregnancy with my son and I'm sorry I didn't now so this is redemption.
Estimated Due Date is August 17, 2007 and Chinese Gender Prediction says it's a girl.
I guessed I might be pregnant when I started hitting this insane exhaustion wall every afternoon last week, it's due to hit me now again in about 20 minutes, hmm I thought, then the constipation set in and I thought hmm again, I've been here before so I bought a test on Friday even though my period wasn't due until today and there it was a faded + sign, nah I thought and threw it away. Did another one the next day and there it was again a +...so i took it outside to big man who was putting a new roof on the shed and asked him if it was real. He seemed to think it was and reacted as he does.
Bought 2 more tests Saturday evening on teh way to work and did one at work, two || this time, definitely there. One more test Sunday morning confirming the two ||s and now I'm starting to believe it.
Made an appt with the doc to have an official test this afternoon, if it's positive then I think I'll really believe it.
Well I'll really believe it when I see the galloping heartbeat on a scan. Sadly I had a miscarriage at 8 weeks the year before little man was born so I'm all too aware of the risks. I'll relax into it after 12 weeks.
In the meantime if you've stumbled across me and you don't know me this might be incredibly boring for you, if you do know me chances are you're getting a link to this in Jan 2007 so are reading backwards, welcome!
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